Since self-publishing my first novella; I’ve had about 12 people tell me I have encouraged them to want to get their own books out here. At least 2 of them want to do their life story. Now this is still new to me and I would tell anyone who is interested in self-publishing to research online because there is a wealth of information, but it is still learn as you go at least for someone like me starting out.
I went through Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP) through www.Amazon.com . For E BOOK • Free to use • Easy to follow steps • They will even let you preview before you publish • If you use their cover designer it is free, and who doesn’t like free? But their options are rather bland. So I opted to have my cover created by a graphics company which can be costly depending on who you go with. If you have a friend who does amazing Photoshop or can do it yourself that is a definite bonus-cost wise. For the Paperback www.Createspace.com This option is mostly free as well; though to get physical proofs is about $2.15 each per copy, at least for my books. It might depend on the thickness of the book. To proof your book online is free. To do a physical copy of your book is pretty easy too. My problem came with uploading the image for my cover just right, but doesn’t mean it has to be your issue. I ended up having the graphic company do it for me. Another bit of advice I see a lot is: Start promoting and marketing your book in advance. Build your readership up before publishing. I didn’t do this, so I can’t say it if works or not, but I’m sure it’s helpful. I do plan to promote my 2nd book at least 2 months in advance, definitely on www.goodreads.com. (I’m presently waiting on my cover, otherwise I would be promoting now) Other self-publishing sites Kobo Nook (Barnes and Noble) Smashwords Googleplay books and many more… Get your e books on as many outlets as possible. When I first e published I went with KDP select where I locked myself in with Amazon exclusively for 90 days (this is optional) Some people swear by this, I think it was helpful in the early days of my book, but then I felt trapped and had to wait out my 90 days-meaning I couldn’t go to any other publishing outlets until my time was over. So with this you have to weigh the pros and cons of it. If you don’t already have one, create a blog and create a fan base. I’ve had blogs over the years. One dedicated to Michael Jackson-www.blameitontheboogiemjforever.webs.com I had a small following. I have a dedicated FB page for Destinee Romance Novella, though some people suggest I should turn it into an author page instead; maybe in the future. My blog site is www.keepinitrealbwtoday.webs.com I try to post things daily to keep it current.
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Signs you may be a placeholder in your boyfriends life
June 2, 2015 By Lisa Warir And by placeholder I mean a woman who is only there for brief companionship (usually sexual benefits for the man) until the woman he really wants comes along. This is one reason why I believe so many women end up as unwed mothers; because she and the young man were sleeping together (obviously) and because of that she thinks they are/were in a true relationship and he was just using her for sex or a place to stay etc. And of course hindsight is 20/20 for a lot of women after the baby or after realizing she shouldn’t have been giving her body to that guy or guys. Disclaimer; If you are a woman who likes or wants to be a perpetual girlfriend, or is not interested in marriage, then this is not for you. Men tend to use sweet words and professions of love to get sex; women on the other hand think because they are giving that intimate side of themselves to a man they’ve been with for weeks, months or years that he loves her. Now it doesn’t mean a man isn’t always in love-but there is a disconnect between men and women out here not being on the same page and I wanted to offer some insight for women who may not understand the confusion they are having dealing with the man they are with. The signs I post are based on observation. Sign #1 He only calls you late at night, or asks to come over only AT NIGHT. Now unless you know for certain he works during the day and it is the only time he can see you, I’m not talking about that scenario. I’m talking about the man who probably has a girlfriend or wife and the only times he wants to come see you is at night. Be wary. Use discernment. Sign #2 He makes promises and never keeps his word. Sign #3 He tells you he doesn’t want to get married. When a man tells you this believe him. What he really means is he doesn’t want to marry you. A lot of women stick around hoping he will change his mind and in that time a woman is getting deeper and deeper involved emotionally and it usually comes to a head through arguments, or after she gets pregnant etc. and she loses him anyway. Sometimes best to cut your losses and move on before the baby, or jaded feelings especially if you want marriage. Sign #4 He asks you to move in with him. I know this has been the new norm in recent decades. Women think this is the next step to marriage, when often times it’s simply a place for the boyfriend to get the benefits of marriage and still hold his single status. I know someone will say that they know a woman who lived with her boyfriend for x amount of years and they got married. Well so do I and it was usually because the boyfriend exhausted his other options or the girlfriend had to beg and plead for the marriage proposal. I’m sure many more scenarios. Although most scenarios never resulted in marriage. It doesn’t take a man 5, 10 plus years to know if he wants to marry you. This indefinite dating is a newer phenomenon as more and more women shack up, or has kids unwed, or have friends with benefits, and one night stands, men aren’t seeing the need to marry. Sign #5 You don’t see him on the holidays or the weekend. Again, if he is working I’m not talking about that. Sign #6 The words that come out of his mouth DOES NOT match his actions and vice versa. Sign #7 Trust your gut. If you don’t have inner peace with a man, re-evaluate why you are with him. Sign #8 This one I’ve been through. When you are with a man, and you cry and have more questions than answers, it is because he is not the one. A man who truly loves you and most importantly wants to be with YOU; does not put you on a roller coaster ride of emotions. Too many women are out here trying to make a relationship with a man who isn’t there for the long haul work. Sign #9 He never tries to meet you half way. When I was with my ex fiancé (if you want to call him that) Here is a metaphor I used to use to describe us when we were “together”. There is a line in the road. And we each had to make it to that line. I would always make it to the line, but when I looked for him, he was still on his end and his back was to me. Red flag; when a man isn’t trying his best to be with you or make you happy. Run. Thoughts.. I’ve heard some women say how after they had the baby their boyfriend just switched up. I’m here to tell you, he didn’t just switch up; you weren’t taking heed to the red flags/signals he was sending from the start. We as women want to believe men; we want to be in relationships with them, so many of us walk into situations with our eyes wide open out of desperation, out of loneliness etc. Sometimes simply being alone for however long that it takes to find you, and ensure of getting the right man in your life is better than dating and exposing yourself to many men who can potentially use you, if you let them. Some women tend to get themselves in a continuous circle of losers on the quest of finding the one. Me personally, I was single for a lot of years, I rarely dated. My life experience is/was different from a lot of women because I didn’t believe in premarital sex (so it limited my dating options) and I didn’t want to end up how so many women end up out here. I know there are many more signs. I wrote this because I don’t know that young women know this. I also know that most women will find out things on their own and in a lot of cases the hard way. I hope this has been food for thought for the reader. Even though I don't like all of the ladies, I have to admit they all looked beautiful in their white.
I'm liking Kenya better this season, than seasons past. I'd been in a few "arguments" on another site over the whole Kenya, Phaedra and Apollo debacle. I felt seasons past, Kenya gave Phaedra plenty of reasons to dislike her. Kenya said in the reunion that everybody flirts. I wonder how she would feel if her husband, if she ever marries were to flirt. What if he flirted with PORSHA, how would SHE feel about that? Phaedra-I was always neutral on Phaedra, but I am really disliking her this season. I don't like how she is using her kids to "punish" Apollo in my opinion. She keeps bringing up not wanting to take her kids to prison to see their father and what effect it will have on them yadda yadda yadda. They are too young to understand their father is in prison (his fault though) all they know is Daddy is not there. Apollo is the man she picked and her holding the kids back from Apollo, she could ultimately hurt THEM. Porsha-I liked Porsha early on, but she is proving to be............I don't know. I liked her better when she came off as sweet and a little dingy, and I do believe she was messing with a married man. She said she doesn't, but if you can mess with a married man, lying shouldn't be too hard for you. Claudia-I'm fairly neutral on her. She doesn't seem warm and inviting to me, but I love how she gets right back at Nene. Nene-I can't stand her. She is loud and bullish and doesn't see that about herself. In the upcoming episodes, when she tells Dr Gardner she doesn't want to talk about her mother, I may find some sympathy for her. I feel that, larger than life, I'm not scared of anything is an act to cover her true feelings of insecurity. I always knew it was something behind that bravado. Kandi-I'm liking Kandi a little more than I use to. |